Letter going home to 4th grade

Dear Families,

I would like to briefly introduce myself, let you know about the counseling services available at Summitt Elementary and outline guidance plans. This will be my 6th year at Summitt (YaHOO!). I am a certified school counselor with a Master’s degree in counseling from Texas State University. I have been a counselor for 12 years, 5 years in Middle School, one year as a Positive Behavior specialist and 6 years in elementary. I am currently part of the AISD counselor leadership team where I support counselors throughout the district.

Counseling services are in 4 categories; Guidance curriculum, Individual Planning, Responsive services and System Support. With the Guidance curriculum, I work with all the students in the classroom and the lessons are designed based on the needs of the grade level. For individual planning, I attend academic meetings and provide support services. Responsive services include individual counseling, group counseling, community outreach and crisis intervention. Finally, System Support includes training staff on how and when to report suspected abuse, teacher/administration consultation and professional development. I also chair No Place For Hate, Red Ribbon Week and No Name Calling Week. I am the coordinator for 504 and the STAAR test. I assist with arrival and I am an expert in tying shoes.

Starting the week of September 24, I will be going into every 4th grade classroom to teach and connect with every student. We will be learning about the brain, executive function skills, learning styles and self-regulation. I will be meeting with them once a week for 6 weeks.

If you have any questions, or if you would like to meet with me, please feel free to call or send an e-mail. I am always happy to connect with families.

Cheers!

Tina Stogdill
Counselor – Summitt Elementary
512-414-4248
Tina.stogdill@austinisd.org

Cyberbullying

We all work hard to raise children who grow into caring, thoughful adults. They make mistakes in the process and hopefully learn along the way. However, the permanence of words and images in cyberspace adds intensity and longevity to the consequences.

The world that we are raising our children is not the same world we grew up with. There were no cell phones (I'm showing my age...) or facebook, no instagram, no text messaging. But this IS the world of our children. Where a picture can get passed around to hundreds of people in a blink of an eye.

Here at Summitt, we are dancing as fast as we can. We are having town hall meetings with students, we are starting in the early grades to give students the words to use to stop bullying. We are reaching out to the community for the resources and access to the latest information. We are involving parents, partnering with them to help to keep our kids safe.

Here are a couple of links:
http://archive.adl.org/education/cyberbullying
http//www.stopbullying.gov/
http://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/ea-brief-a.pdf

If you have information to share on how to keep our kids safe - Please give me a call.

I am getting information from Murchison about transition (YIKES!). Going home today, is information about joining the Orchestra.
If you are planning to go to one of the magnet schools I am happy to help with all of the data you have to submit and those deadlines are fast approaching.
I will post transition info as I get it.

Time sure flies!

We are 9 weeks into the school year and it feels like the first day was yesterday... my how time flies when you are having fun!
I have been working with 1st grade students using Kelso's Choice Conflict Management for Children. 1st graders now know 9 ways to peacefully resolve conflict. Its so exciting seeing children solve their own problems!
Next I have headed to fourth and fifth grade to do bully prevention lessons. More details to come!
I am about 1/2 way through my lunch groups (we meet for 7 weeks and I have 5 lunch group currently going). I love spending time with the kids, they get to get out of the cafeteria, and I get to know them a little better. During lunch group, once everyone is seated, we talk about "one High and one Low", one thing that is going great and one thing they are struggling with. After lunch, we have about 7 minutes and we usually play a cooperative game. The kids seem to enjoy the time and we have become a tight knit little group.

Last week, during group, I looked around and realized that everyone at the table had experienced a loss this fall semester. I took the time to talk about the things to say to someone who is grieving (and they came up with their own list!). I found that the students are smart, caring and insightful. What a gift it is to spend time with them.
Cheers!

Guidance lessons in Kinder and 1st grade

I have started going into the Kindergarten and First grade classes. In Kindergarten, we are learning ways to calm our bodies and why its important to follow directions. In first grade, we are learning the difference between big problems and little problems. Big problems need to be handled by an adult. First graders are learning different ways to take care of little problems using Kelso's choice.
Next week I will be starting groups - if you think your kiddo could benifit from group, give me a call or send me an e-mail. I am taking teacher requests for the groups too.
Cheers!

Love & Logic is my favorite methodology for raising healthy kiddos! They send out an emailer that has awesome tips to keep us reminded of those good parenting (and teaching) skills. Go to their website to sign up - its FREE! www.loveandlogic.com

This week's email is on shaping self-concept and I have posted it here:

Shaping Self-Concept, one of our most popular audios, teaches a very special type of love. It's the type that allows our kids to struggle... lets them work thruough their trials...and guides them toward independence instead of insecurity.

This love can be expressed daily by:
Allowing kids to wrestle with tying their shoes...instead of automatically jumping in and doing it for them.
Letting them dress themselves...even if the clothes they choose don't match.
Teaching them how to talk to their teachers about problems at school...rather than always doing it for them.
Expecting that they speak up and order meals for themselves...instead of ordering for them.
Having them call the insurance company and arrange for their own car insurance...instead of doing it all for them.
Letting them do most of the work required to fill out their college applications...rather than preparing all of the paperwork for them.
Remembering that the more things they learn to do for themselves, the stronger and more confident they will become!

Isn't it ironic that our kids have to face some tough times in order to live confident, joyful lives?

Dr. Charles Fay
Love & Logic Institute

Welcome to a new year! I have neglected the blog and I was inspired by Anh Cao to make a commitment to keeping it updated. She is one of my favorite teachers, always looking at ways to improve her craft (and she shares that energy with everyone around her!)

We kicked off this school year with lots of changes, we have a new Principal and a new Assistant Principal and we are excited about all of the new possibilities.

The Character word for September is Responsibility. Students will be talking about what it means to be responsible and at the end of this month, each teacher will nominate one student from their class to have lunch with me in the great hall.

I will be in Kindergarten and First grade classrooms once a week for 5 weeks starting September 19. In Kinder we will be naming feelings and identifying facial expressions. In First grade we will start with Kelso's Choice - Conflict Management for Children.

Summitt was named a No Place For Hate school last year and we are going for it again! All students are asked to sign the Resolution of Respect and we will be rolling out our first school wide intervention at the end of September - more information to come!

I will be presenting Love & Logic at PTA meetings - so be ready for some fun!

Its going to be a great school year!

Cheers!

Wrapping up another wonderful School year!

My very good friend, Judy Stubblefield, said "A parents greatest fear is that our child will make a choice that will alter their life forever". Her words are ringing in my ears as I think about going into summer.
Please. Insist on wearing a helmet while riding a bike, skateboard, scooter, motorcycle..... Our community is still in pain over the death of a 16 year old boy who "made a choice that altered his life forever". He was not wearing a helmet while skateboarding.

Stay safe and have a Wonderful summer break.

Peace.

Parenting Class

I am gearing up to host the Parenting with Love & Logic class again. I always get so excited about the class, it always feels like great group therapy. The beauty of the class is that I am not the "giver of all knowledge"... all the parents have such a wealth of information to share and it is my honor to be a part of it all.

The following is from the newsletter that goes out from Love & Logic... Enjoy!

ARE YOU SICK AND TIRED OF HAVING TO COMPETE WITH YOUR CHILD'S ELECTRONIC DEVICES?

I know a mother and father who eat a lot of cold food - all thanks to certain electronics corperations and their teen's single-mided obsession with the darn things.

Yes! Nearly every night, these parents beg him to turn off the compter, turn off (or pause) the television, put down the video game controller, or unplug from the music. Their pleas fall on deaf (or earbud filled) ears.

Its not so much that the young man is blatantly defiant. He acknowledges them, at least with a grunt or the universal "just a second." But he's so engrossed in electronics land, that he truly has a hard time ripping his mind away from the device to join the family at the table. Of course, his parents get more and more frustrated as they experience less and less success wooing him from his high-tech goodies. obviously, this trend is not healthy for the young man or for the evening family mean.

Some parents have discovered a magical Love and Logic enforceable statement to help with this type of electronics abuse:

"We provide ______ for kids who _____ . "
+ "we provide computer time for kids who shut it down the first time they are asked."
+ "We provide television time for kids who have chores and homework done."
+ "We provide cell phones for kids who refrain from texting during the sermon at church."

As parents, we do provide these things, don't we? And when is a good time to remind kids of all the things that we provide? In a long-winded lecture when we are frustrated? How about before the item or privilege is abused, or with lots of empathy when it has been removed?

The Key to success with this phrase is our willingness to follow-through and the empathy in our voices, and on our faces, when kids lose the use of the device when it is abused.

Positive Reinforcement

I hear people say all the time "You should use Positive Reinforcement"... what does that MEAN though?
Are we going to rely on external controls to maintain student behavior, or are we going to orient ourselves toward working with students to develop internalized controls? Do we want to make kids behave, or get them to want to behave?

People are pretty basic....We start doing the correct behavior behavior because there is a payoff for us.

I have a GoldenDoodle named Scout. When we first started training Scout, he wouldnt do a thing without a treat. Now he behaves and follows commands because he wants to be a good boy.

Our kids are not much different than my GoldenDoodle... heck, I'm not much different than my GoldenDoodle! I now, happily, do the Laundry. There is usually a "treat" for me when I take the clothes out of the wash... my husband regularly forgets to empty his pockets and yesterday I found a very clean 10 dollar bill. I wouldnt give us doing the laundry for anything!

The point is... there is a payoff for ALL of our behavior. Scout gets a biscuit or a scratch on his ear, I get a 10 dollar bill. We just have to think about the behaviors we want to encourage, for all I know, my husband is doing it on purpose - his pay off is that he gets his laundry done without any grumbling from me.

Some Tips for Helping Anxious Kids

I copied the following from the Love & Logic Institute -

Like nearly all of the challenges faced by parents, anxiety in children has many possible causes and solutions. Fortunately, Love and Logic offers a variety of "experiments" to determine what might work best with each unique child:

Establish or strengthen family routines. With anxious, fearful kids, experiments with having set times for meals, bath times, reading, chores, bed times, etc.

Provide firmer limits. There are few things more reassuring to a child than knowing that they have parents who are strong enough to beat-up the Boogie Man if he broke into the house at night. All children wonder if they have parents who are strong enough to keep them safe. One of the ways they find out is to test limits and see if their parents appear weak or very strong.

Give less attention to anxious behavior. Experiment with using fewer words when your child is upset. Simply hug them and say, "I know you can handle this."

Model Calmness and optimism. Our children will rarely be any calmer and more confident than we are.

Avoid reinforcing avoidance behavior. Too frequently we traumatize children more by allowing them to repeatedly avoid healthy activities that can build their sense of security and self-esteem.

Allow your child to be a child. Every year, children are being pushed harder to become stars in academics, athletics, music, etc. This isn't good for kids.

Consider professional help. Because anxiety can have so many different causes, its always wise to get a professional medical opinion.

What do School Counselors DO?

I was at a National Board Meeting this weekend and during lunch, a classroom teacher asked me, "So what do you do when you are not doing Guidance activities in the classroom?"
It was then that I realized that if a Teacher doesn't know what School Counselors do... odds are, Parents and community members dont know either.

So.... in a nutshell, this is what I do.

The first two weeks I consult with parents about new behaviors they are seeing with their child and also any changes in the home (new job, lost a job, new house, death of a grandparent, marriage, divorce ect).
I also consult with Teachers about the students they have in their classroom, help them problem solve and help them to provide the best educational environment they can.

Once the frantic first two weeks pass, I have the following schedule:
Monday - I meet with the principals, see individual students, do group counseling.
Tuesday - ARD/IMPACT/504 and parent conferences
Wednesday thru Friday - Guidance activities
Everyday - Crisis intervention

Then I have an area called Universal Components... they include the following:
Career/post seconday exploration (career fair, college day, classroom guidance), Family and Community Relationships (parenting classes, Blog, PTA, Parent newsletter), Attendance (Monitoring students attendance, monday morning groups, home visits, phone calls home), Academic connections (lunch group, IMPACT, classroom guidance, data reviews).

I also prepare Guidance lessons that are developmentally appropriate for pre-k thru 5 th grade.

Whew! So.... If you were ever wondering what a School Counselor does, hopefully, this is your answer!

I love this work and I love this community!

Cheers!

Meet the Teacher Night

I am always amazed whenever we start the school year by how many people just want to help other people. I felt that energy today at Meet the teacher Night. Teachers were pitching in and helping each other, other staff posted themselves in the great hall, looking into the faces of the people entering the building for that "I'm new here" look on their face. You could see the new families relax when they knew they were welcome here.

I think that's all any of us want. Is to feel welcome. Wanted. Loved. Respected. I feel so blessed to be a part of the energy and magic that makes our school great.

I'm home.

Bumblebee Breath

I thought I would share a Yoga technique for relaxing and soothing.

Bumblebee Breath

Bees hum their days away, visiting flowers and making honey. As you hum, think of what makes you happy!

Wherever you are - walking, working, playing or resting, breathe in fully and as you breathe out hum like a bee.

Make sure your face and lips are soft so you can feel the vibration.

Repeat for as long as you like and experiment: humming from high to low - notice the differences.

Peace for the summer. Buzzzzzzzzzzzzz

End of year Stress

You would think that everyone would be relaxed in anticipation of having a summer break... well if you have been inside a school lately, the stress is palatable. Teachers have a ton of details to take care of at the end, many are moving their classrooms and on top of that they have their own personal lives that get complicated.
The kids are facing time that is not as structured, they will be away from their friends and the predictability of school.
Parents are stressed too! They are dealing with stressed kids and teachers on top of their jobs and their own complicated lives.
Whew!
Remember to take a minute, breathe deep. Look at the people around you and remember that they have their own life drama that is playing out and their short temper might not have a darned thing to do with you.

Ways to Manage Stress
1. Surround yourself with those people who value positive thinking.
2. Don't think that you are the only one that can do something! Ask for help if tasks are too big for you alone!
3. Lear flexibility and know you can not control all situations.
4. Eat well balanced meals.... don't skip them - and LIMIT PURE SUGAR!
5. Get plenty of sleep.
6. Exercise -it will boost your energy level and can improve your mood.
7. Make time to do things you enjoy.
8. Think of mistakes as new opportunities to learn.
9. LAUGH! Look for the humor in situations that relate to you or others in your life.

Peace.

Workshop

May 18, 2010

I went to a workshop yesterday that made me think... and reflect. The topic was Healing Racism and there were people from AISD, the City of Austin, the Sheriffs department and APD. I looked around the room and I saw people who really cared about this city and where we are going. The conversations were insightful and heartfelt but I walked away wondering... now what.

What do I do to bring this information back to MY home, Summitt? How do I open this conversation? How can I make it palatable?


Looks like I have some work to do this summer.

New Adventure

Well, how do you deal with the sadness of not seeing your students all summer long? Start planning for next year, of course!
We have lots of fun things starting next school year - it is always an adventure!
Stay tuned!

What is Confidentiality?

Confidentiality means that anything discussed with the counselor will be kept private. The counselor will not divulge any information to parents, teachers, administrators or others. There are exceptions however: 1) If the person is a danger to him/herself or others, 2) under court order, 3) if the person gives their permission to speak.