Positive Reinforcement

I hear people say all the time "You should use Positive Reinforcement"... what does that MEAN though?
Are we going to rely on external controls to maintain student behavior, or are we going to orient ourselves toward working with students to develop internalized controls? Do we want to make kids behave, or get them to want to behave?

People are pretty basic....We start doing the correct behavior behavior because there is a payoff for us.

I have a GoldenDoodle named Scout. When we first started training Scout, he wouldnt do a thing without a treat. Now he behaves and follows commands because he wants to be a good boy.

Our kids are not much different than my GoldenDoodle... heck, I'm not much different than my GoldenDoodle! I now, happily, do the Laundry. There is usually a "treat" for me when I take the clothes out of the wash... my husband regularly forgets to empty his pockets and yesterday I found a very clean 10 dollar bill. I wouldnt give us doing the laundry for anything!

The point is... there is a payoff for ALL of our behavior. Scout gets a biscuit or a scratch on his ear, I get a 10 dollar bill. We just have to think about the behaviors we want to encourage, for all I know, my husband is doing it on purpose - his pay off is that he gets his laundry done without any grumbling from me.

Some Tips for Helping Anxious Kids

I copied the following from the Love & Logic Institute -

Like nearly all of the challenges faced by parents, anxiety in children has many possible causes and solutions. Fortunately, Love and Logic offers a variety of "experiments" to determine what might work best with each unique child:

Establish or strengthen family routines. With anxious, fearful kids, experiments with having set times for meals, bath times, reading, chores, bed times, etc.

Provide firmer limits. There are few things more reassuring to a child than knowing that they have parents who are strong enough to beat-up the Boogie Man if he broke into the house at night. All children wonder if they have parents who are strong enough to keep them safe. One of the ways they find out is to test limits and see if their parents appear weak or very strong.

Give less attention to anxious behavior. Experiment with using fewer words when your child is upset. Simply hug them and say, "I know you can handle this."

Model Calmness and optimism. Our children will rarely be any calmer and more confident than we are.

Avoid reinforcing avoidance behavior. Too frequently we traumatize children more by allowing them to repeatedly avoid healthy activities that can build their sense of security and self-esteem.

Allow your child to be a child. Every year, children are being pushed harder to become stars in academics, athletics, music, etc. This isn't good for kids.

Consider professional help. Because anxiety can have so many different causes, its always wise to get a professional medical opinion.

What do School Counselors DO?

I was at a National Board Meeting this weekend and during lunch, a classroom teacher asked me, "So what do you do when you are not doing Guidance activities in the classroom?"
It was then that I realized that if a Teacher doesn't know what School Counselors do... odds are, Parents and community members dont know either.

So.... in a nutshell, this is what I do.

The first two weeks I consult with parents about new behaviors they are seeing with their child and also any changes in the home (new job, lost a job, new house, death of a grandparent, marriage, divorce ect).
I also consult with Teachers about the students they have in their classroom, help them problem solve and help them to provide the best educational environment they can.

Once the frantic first two weeks pass, I have the following schedule:
Monday - I meet with the principals, see individual students, do group counseling.
Tuesday - ARD/IMPACT/504 and parent conferences
Wednesday thru Friday - Guidance activities
Everyday - Crisis intervention

Then I have an area called Universal Components... they include the following:
Career/post seconday exploration (career fair, college day, classroom guidance), Family and Community Relationships (parenting classes, Blog, PTA, Parent newsletter), Attendance (Monitoring students attendance, monday morning groups, home visits, phone calls home), Academic connections (lunch group, IMPACT, classroom guidance, data reviews).

I also prepare Guidance lessons that are developmentally appropriate for pre-k thru 5 th grade.

Whew! So.... If you were ever wondering what a School Counselor does, hopefully, this is your answer!

I love this work and I love this community!

Cheers!

Meet the Teacher Night

I am always amazed whenever we start the school year by how many people just want to help other people. I felt that energy today at Meet the teacher Night. Teachers were pitching in and helping each other, other staff posted themselves in the great hall, looking into the faces of the people entering the building for that "I'm new here" look on their face. You could see the new families relax when they knew they were welcome here.

I think that's all any of us want. Is to feel welcome. Wanted. Loved. Respected. I feel so blessed to be a part of the energy and magic that makes our school great.

I'm home.

Bumblebee Breath

I thought I would share a Yoga technique for relaxing and soothing.

Bumblebee Breath

Bees hum their days away, visiting flowers and making honey. As you hum, think of what makes you happy!

Wherever you are - walking, working, playing or resting, breathe in fully and as you breathe out hum like a bee.

Make sure your face and lips are soft so you can feel the vibration.

Repeat for as long as you like and experiment: humming from high to low - notice the differences.

Peace for the summer. Buzzzzzzzzzzzzz

End of year Stress

You would think that everyone would be relaxed in anticipation of having a summer break... well if you have been inside a school lately, the stress is palatable. Teachers have a ton of details to take care of at the end, many are moving their classrooms and on top of that they have their own personal lives that get complicated.
The kids are facing time that is not as structured, they will be away from their friends and the predictability of school.
Parents are stressed too! They are dealing with stressed kids and teachers on top of their jobs and their own complicated lives.
Whew!
Remember to take a minute, breathe deep. Look at the people around you and remember that they have their own life drama that is playing out and their short temper might not have a darned thing to do with you.

Ways to Manage Stress
1. Surround yourself with those people who value positive thinking.
2. Don't think that you are the only one that can do something! Ask for help if tasks are too big for you alone!
3. Lear flexibility and know you can not control all situations.
4. Eat well balanced meals.... don't skip them - and LIMIT PURE SUGAR!
5. Get plenty of sleep.
6. Exercise -it will boost your energy level and can improve your mood.
7. Make time to do things you enjoy.
8. Think of mistakes as new opportunities to learn.
9. LAUGH! Look for the humor in situations that relate to you or others in your life.

Peace.

Workshop

May 18, 2010

I went to a workshop yesterday that made me think... and reflect. The topic was Healing Racism and there were people from AISD, the City of Austin, the Sheriffs department and APD. I looked around the room and I saw people who really cared about this city and where we are going. The conversations were insightful and heartfelt but I walked away wondering... now what.

What do I do to bring this information back to MY home, Summitt? How do I open this conversation? How can I make it palatable?


Looks like I have some work to do this summer.

New Adventure

Well, how do you deal with the sadness of not seeing your students all summer long? Start planning for next year, of course!
We have lots of fun things starting next school year - it is always an adventure!
Stay tuned!

What is Confidentiality?

Confidentiality means that anything discussed with the counselor will be kept private. The counselor will not divulge any information to parents, teachers, administrators or others. There are exceptions however: 1) If the person is a danger to him/herself or others, 2) under court order, 3) if the person gives their permission to speak.